Good To Be Back
So today was slated to be the absolute worse day ever. Scheduled was a super-hard A.P. Calc test, then an appointment with my grad student at Stony Brook (the transportation for which I failed to follow through with by the way), then an Art Honor Society Meeting back at school (which conflicted slightly with my ISR meeting), and then finally I had to catch the bus to the [really tough] opposing school for tennis. (Plus, after all that, I wouldn't be home until 9 due to a college presentation at the Long Island Mariott in Uniondale).
So did I crash and burn? Surprisingly, no. In fact, even though my math teacher is still a horrible horrible person, the test wasn't as hard and obscure as she made it seem. Also, I did manage to secure transportation to Stony Brook, and my meeting went very well, so I should be well on my way to meeting that competition deadline.
But what was especially thrilling today though was my tennis match. See, lately, I've been playing quite terribly (to put it simply, I've been sucking a lot), and I wasn't able to figure out why. But this past week, I've been able to find out what was wrong.
Firstly, there's the fact that I need quite some time to warm up. The fact that I barely did so (and the fact that there was a horrid wind that day) cost my partner and me our first match of the season. But that's not all.
You see, a few nights ago, as I pondered about a college essay regarding my most meaningful activity, I realized as I considered tennis for a topic that lately I've been playing only for myself. Instead of playing for my partner, instead of playing for the team, I've been pretty selfish, and I've let meaningless things consume my thoughts.
So this time, I wasn't going to let that happen. We won yesterday, but today confirmed it. As we all struggled against our counterparts on the only other undefeated team, in our case, 4-6, splitting sets, 6-4, and going to a tiebreaker in the very last set, 7-6 (7-4), I remembered what it meant to play for the team. I remembered what drove me to undefeated and near-undefeated records when I was younger. I remembered what it meant to take risks, to play without worries, to play for fun. Tennis is fun, and I remembered.
So I played. So we played. Skimming the net, spinning down alleys, fast and hard the balls flew... and it felt wonderful. Slamming them down, hearing that sound - oh that glorious sound of a super strong smash! - brought nostalgia to my heart. And my heart beat and beat, and my blood pumped and pumped, pumped adrenaline to my head, and my head filled with adrenaline was filled with excitement, with memories, and with hope and the majestic idea of victory at last!
And it was just like old times again, those times when I played, when I really played, and the love and fun I felt back then. And as I turned away victorious, I smiled my long lost smile, my wonderful smile, and there was only one thought in my head.
It's good to be back.
So did I crash and burn? Surprisingly, no. In fact, even though my math teacher is still a horrible horrible person, the test wasn't as hard and obscure as she made it seem. Also, I did manage to secure transportation to Stony Brook, and my meeting went very well, so I should be well on my way to meeting that competition deadline.
But what was especially thrilling today though was my tennis match. See, lately, I've been playing quite terribly (to put it simply, I've been sucking a lot), and I wasn't able to figure out why. But this past week, I've been able to find out what was wrong.
Firstly, there's the fact that I need quite some time to warm up. The fact that I barely did so (and the fact that there was a horrid wind that day) cost my partner and me our first match of the season. But that's not all.
You see, a few nights ago, as I pondered about a college essay regarding my most meaningful activity, I realized as I considered tennis for a topic that lately I've been playing only for myself. Instead of playing for my partner, instead of playing for the team, I've been pretty selfish, and I've let meaningless things consume my thoughts.
So this time, I wasn't going to let that happen. We won yesterday, but today confirmed it. As we all struggled against our counterparts on the only other undefeated team, in our case, 4-6, splitting sets, 6-4, and going to a tiebreaker in the very last set, 7-6 (7-4), I remembered what it meant to play for the team. I remembered what drove me to undefeated and near-undefeated records when I was younger. I remembered what it meant to take risks, to play without worries, to play for fun. Tennis is fun, and I remembered.
So I played. So we played. Skimming the net, spinning down alleys, fast and hard the balls flew... and it felt wonderful. Slamming them down, hearing that sound - oh that glorious sound of a super strong smash! - brought nostalgia to my heart. And my heart beat and beat, and my blood pumped and pumped, pumped adrenaline to my head, and my head filled with adrenaline was filled with excitement, with memories, and with hope and the majestic idea of victory at last!
And it was just like old times again, those times when I played, when I really played, and the love and fun I felt back then. And as I turned away victorious, I smiled my long lost smile, my wonderful smile, and there was only one thought in my head.
It's good to be back.
prism:
sunshine (daily rants)
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